Our Raw Move from Texas to Spain: Packing Tears, Moving Chaos, and Arrival

What does it look like to move Internationally? To leave almost everything and go? To start with, there is the multitude of items that we had to go through and decide to bring, store, sell or trash. We went from room to room and emptied it as much as possible while still living there for two weeks. Coordinating the sale of things was just as time consuming as packing. You have to coordinate messages and prepare the items for the buyers. By and by, every room was emptied and every item gone through.

Let me stop there and comment on a few things. The last several weeks have been difficult, emotional, and overwhelming at times. It felt like mourning a life and losing everything. Hopes and dreams once held now had to be replaced by the unknown. Memories that items and the house held now had to be released. The amount of decisions was paralyzing. The call God had given us was loud. The cost of not obeying high. It helped when Kyle was there to tell me to throw things away. It helped when God whispered to my heart that it was ok to let it go and that He was all I needed and He would provide. Those two things, and encouragement from family and friends, are the only thing that kept me going. Packing one thing after another and closing that chapter of our lives.

So many times, I wanted to stop and not do this and hold on to things. Ultimately though, God carried us through and we made it to the other side. When we visited Spain in October of last year, we had to get a bigger car just to fit our bags and we only had three or four bags. That hung over me as I packed; continuously wrestling with am I taking too much? Are we going to be able to take it from the airport to wherever? How do I keep letting go when I have let go of so much? To have friends and family asking for things too was difficult. It was as if they were asking for a part of me… at times I was able to simply say yes, other times it took me several days to come around and give it away. Could I trust God enough to take all these things away from me? Could I trust that I would be provided for? That I would have all I needed… that my children would? It was not a resounding yes in my head… it was by faith that I did it… emotions told me no, but faith told me that I knew I could trust God. He who promised is faithful. That is who I am relying on.

So back to the day of travel. We drove only in two cars, a pick up truck and pilot. Everything fit very easily with all of us. We didn’t have to have bags in our laps or be squished in. The drive was smooth. No traffic to speak of and a quiet time of reflection before we left. Arriving at the airport, we got parking spaces close to the doors and made two easy trips to the check in counter. We arrived early and even had to spend an hour waiting for the counters to open talking with family and a gentleman in line in front of us.

The gentleman and I talked about travel, us moving, and what he thought of it. How we must be afraid with so many children and worried what might happen? But, those thoughts do not trouble me. I have known a lifetime of near trouble and death and God proving shelter. I have walked through some fire and yet have not been burnt. This same God is the one who I trust them with. If he can protect me, he can protect them. And, if the God of the universe is unable to protect them, how could I? I am but one person, with no power, influence or money. Only God is able.

Beyond that we talked about marriage, divorce, and church. How God can let bad things happen to good people and can we even ask why? I learned this man had lost his daughter when she was 23 to an accident. Of course I can understand asking why? It’s something I’ve done my whole life.. but the answer God always seems to give me is because He knows best.. He can use even the worst possible things for good and that He was still with me through it all. I tried to explain it to this man.. I am trying to explain it to you here. But, I think this is something only God can show your heart. Something you have to walk out in your own life. But, I pray for this man. That he would not worry or fear when trouble and suffering come. That it would lead him to the cross where he is safe and held. I pray the same for you!

We checked our 19 bags with no issue, though it was time consuming to check so many. Checking the bags ended up being the least cumbersome way to get our stuff overseas rather than shipping it. We got through security, again no issue. Even on the other side, where I thought we would be bored and have endless waiting time seemed to zoom by and then we were boarding. Our flight was great. We enjoyed the food and sleeping. The kids did not fuss or cry a lot. It truly was just one level of grace and goodness after the next. We arrived and headed through customs to our bags. Though it seemed to be a long wait for our bags to start coming out, everything was there. Nothing was missing and nothing broken beyond a few scratches and tears here and there. What a miracle!

The biggest hurdle we had was here. How do we get the 19 bags, two carry-ons, a stroller and baby, and two carseat bags from the carousal to out the door where help waited? We loaded up 6 carts and had Declan in the stroller. The two carseat bags at first were on the carts. Halfway to the door, Kyle had to carry them while pushing the heaviest cart to make it easier for the boys to push and see. It was a miracle. The three older boys helped push a cart each. I pushed two carts and Jairus pushed Declan in the stroller. Thankfully he has been training for this day and loves to help push the stroller! We did it. I almost started crying at the doors seeing Isabelle and Eli waiting on the other side for us and helping take over the heavy carts from the boys!

Then, we got to the cars and not only did everything fit we all did as well. Our original plan was to load up the cars and Kyle with a few of the boys take the train. Miracle after Miracle. I think back to packing as God kept saying let go Blessing. You don’t need this thing. Don’t hold on to it. And, I think what a blessing it was I listened making this possible though the pain of letting go was hard.

I was thinking about the drive from the airport to Betel, on the airplane, and how tired I was from the travel and not sleeping as much since Kyle and I took turns holding Declan. What a blessing it was to have them picking us up because sure enough on the drive I fell asleep for a bit. We arrived and they had prepared everything from beds, to towels to some food. On my phone I have a photo as my background that says, “Do not fear the road ahead, for God walks with you. His hand will guide you, and His grace will sustain you through every trial.” It has. It will continue.

I know this is long, but I just am in awe at every step of this journey because it has been so hard. It was hard to say good bye. It was hard to pack and sell and empty… but wow! How God came through and made everything so smooth sure makes me think it was worth it and that we are on the right path. Now trouble may come. Our house is empty but not sold. We don’t have a place here yet.. but He will still be here. We are thankful!

I hope this encourages you. If you are walking difficult a path and God is asking you to obey and it hurts. You are fighting your feelings and flesh, keep fighting. Keep obeying. He will be with you and He is worth it.

Prayer Requests:

• For our house to sell, and us to find a place
• The adjustment to Spain, the culture and the language
• For our visa appointments
• That we don’t look back, but press on toward the goal.

Philippians 3:13-14
Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.